Hello true believers!
I had a day off today... Halleluiah you think when you get a day off. But for me, a day filled with time to be filled fills me with uncontrollable rage. And desire for cider. I awoke to CBBC nipping at my ears like a flick knife; not quite substantial enough to cause any considerable pain but not small enough to simply tickle. Here's something that does tickle: The Jeremy Kyle Show. Never has the the formula of a comfortable middle class man, shouting at a working class man, provoking violence in their simple minds so they will consequently be beaten by a burly security guard worked so well in the 09:30 slot. I enjoyed this debacle so much that I donned a purple suit and hurled abuse at locals. During this endevour I encountered Kate Moss, bird of that junkie that was in a band once. It appears she's fallen on hard times, as she was working at the chippie in town and looking rough as sandpaper. Thorny sandpaper. I initiated the charm and managed to get a chicken and mushroom. I then read her a poem (that spotty pale type she's with writes poems). Needless to say she didnt enjoy it. It seems the court injunction has yet again been breached.
Then I drank cider whilst listening to radio 3.
Check back next week when I'll be doing more fun things